


milk.

by AutumnalBloom, awbucks



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, Barnes Kids, Bucky Barnes - Freeform, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Children, Gun Violence, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, James Barnes - Freeform, Kids, M/M, No Sex, Rebecca Barnes - Freeform, Romance, This Is Happier Than It Sounds, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Violence, Zombie Apocalypse, mature - Freeform, tony stark - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-13 17:07:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14752893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutumnalBloom/pseuds/AutumnalBloom, https://archiveofourown.org/users/awbucks/pseuds/awbucks
Summary: The zombie apocalypse struck. Tony is a lost scientist searching for his butler/surrogate father and a cure. Bucky is a raider, hiding out in a mall with his family, and hiding his raids from Tony. Things get tough, but they don't give in.





	1. Chapter 1

Tony was afraid. He kept running faster but there were many zombies, all going at their top speed. Which in fairness wasn’t all that fast, but it was as though they were all pushing each other along. They were keeping up and Tony didn’t know where to go. He spotted a mall and went for it. It was barricaded but he saw a small opening. Just big enough for a person to crawl through, at least a relatively small person. Hopefully, he fit that bill. Without thinking twice, he dove inside and shimmied in. The zombies tried to follow, but they weren’t all that smart. However, there was still a problem. Once he was just far enough in to be away from the zombies, but not close enough to force himself in..he got stuck. Damn, my lovely ass. He tried to move but it really wasn’t working. Fuck. He didn’t want to die like this. Somebody had to build these barricades. 

“Hello? Can someone help me out here? I’m stuck in uh- between the sofa and the new mattress.” It was clearly made from salvaged mall parts. “Hello? Please?” His voice was tinged with an edge of fear. The zombies were still trying to figure it out. He was really screwed if they did.

Bucky pulled the kid before anything else. Some people had a shoot first ask questions later but he considered himself a fairly nice person. And besides, maybe he had something to give him in turn for saving his ass. Most people running from zombies don’t immediately kill their saviors. And besides, Bucky was the one with a baseball bat. 

“Guessing you weren’t too good at gymnastics,” Bucky muttered as he helped the guy get back on his feet, studying him fiercely. Behind him was where the real entrance to their shelter was. Bucky wasn’t stupid. He stood between that entryway and the kid, creating a barrier between his siblings and the stranger. 

“You got anything good on ya? Willing to trade? Compensation for saving you from Fred and Gina?” Yes, Bucky had come to naming some of the longer-lasting zombies out there. Fred and Gina were mostly harmless, would chase you for a bit but then would get lost and tired not too long after. Hard as fuck to kill though. So, they’d stayed half-dead, or whatever the hell they were, and Bucky fought them off while he went to town on the lemmings. 

“Saving someone’s ass doesn’t come cheap. You’re gonna have to pay up.” Bucky stopped for a beat, realizing that probably sounded like a serious statement to someone who didn’t know him. Bucky was 5’9” and well built, with a nasty glare to boot. Most people found him scary nowadays. Which was good, he supposed. Meant fewer people to fight off for food and water. 

“Kidding.” 

Tony was internally panicking until he heard that. Fuck, he didn’t have much. Especially not much that’d be worth something to people here. A golden candlestick? That wasn’t going to help much. “I’m sorry, all I’ve got is a little food.” He pulled out a can of Spaghettios. He usually only had just enough to feed himself, but that was okay. “I know it isn’t much. I don’t have a lot, though. Mostly books and - and I have a little medicine too but it’s all experimental.” This man might’ve saved him, and sure, he was handsome, but..he was also scary. 

Tony looked around for a second. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. I just didn’t have much of a choice.” It was that or be eaten. Wait, Fred and Gina? That was weird. Most people didn’t name their zombies. “You wouldn’t happen to have seen an older man who looks like a butler, have you?” 

Bucky shook his head, Most people weren’t really wearing black tuxes, and how else did one look like a butler? Maybe he had a dirty dishrag over his right arm or something, trying to be a servant for the new era. He was quickly distracted though, by the sound of a baby crying and the shuffle of feet. 

“Bucky! Shelia’s crying again, and I dunno know what to do and I know you told me to keep her quiet but-” Bucky gestured for the kid to follow him into the shelter. He seemed harmless enough, and honestly, right now he could use an extra set of hands. It was just Bucky with four kids all under the age of fifteen. The oldest of the bunch, Becca, was cradling Shelia in her arms, but the poor baby was crying her eyes out, most likely wanting her mom. 

Not that she would be coming around again. Ever. Bucky gave Becca an apologetic glance and took Sheila from her, gently rocking her back and forth. 

“Heat up some of the clean water and mix a bit of that milk powder in? I think that’ll help.” With that under control somewhat, he turned back to the kid who seemed to be about his age. Bucky held his hand out for Sheila almost subconsciously (as he’d done a million times before, back when everything was normal and Mom and Dad were still alive and-” She wrapped her little baby fists around his pointer finger and waved it around a little, already calming down. 

For some reason, she really liked Bucky. “Sorry.” He said to the guy. “You on your way back to your shelter? Do you have one? Or are you still on the run?” 

Tony shook his head. “I’ve been taking shelter wherever I can. I used to live a little further south in a mansion but that was overrun pretty quickly and-” He took a breath. Why was he telling the man all this? “Lemme start over. My name is Tony. And..no, I don’t have anywhere to stay.” He watched the other girl heat up the water, with some difficulty. 

“I could probably rig up a better heating element. And a generator too. Maybe I could repay you that way? I’m really only good at more uh..scientific pursuits.” Wasn’t like he’d been expecting the zombie apocalypse. Now all he wanted was to find the only man who’d ever been a father to him. But, he could stop for a little and help this man. They seemed about the same age, but three times as stressed. And...Tony was starting to lose hope anyways. His worst fear was losing Jarvis, but maybe he was already gone. Maybe it was time to give that up and focus on helping other people.  
“Or I could try to find something more useful. Sorry.” 

Bucky’s jaw nearly dropped and he tried to read Tony’s face for insincerity. “You’d get us a generator?” That would be like fucking gold right now. Could keep them warm, power a radio, a light or stove. He couldn’t believe it. He honestly couldn’t. Sheila bit down on his finger with her first tooth and Bucky was brought back down to Earth. He looked over at Tony, eyes betraying the rest of his expression, showing too much hope. 

“How’d you go about doing that out here? Can’t exactly go to the store.” 

Tony looked around. “Well,” He said, studying a few different pieces and stores around the mall. “I think I can salvage enough, between mall kiosks, the roof, and..hmm, maybe the air conditioner. Yeah, that’d do. He could use some of the tools at the jewelry store and some of his own. “I can’t promise that it’ll be perfect, but it should generate enough to power a few things, maybe at once.” He smiled a little.

“I am- or, at least was, an engineer. Just got home from MIT when it all happened.” It felt like the world was over. Maybe it was. But Bucky was right. There was no going to the store, or going and getting a regular job. Now everybody had to struggle to survive, and Tony’s best talent was being able to build shit. Which wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t all that great either.

“I’m not so good at killing zombies, but I am pretty good at making things.”

Becca took Sheila back and sat down to feed her. Their two brothers, Georgie and Thomas, were out scavving for metal, batteries, anything, out in the mall. It left their two-room shelter fairly roomy, almost comfortable, but they’d be back soon, and the walls would close in on them again. 

“If you think you can do that, you’re welcome to stay here with us. Can’t promise it’ll be perfect, but we have clean water and a secure place to sleep.” There was a scream from outside. 

“Mostly.” He pulled off his heavy coat, was part of his ‘ armor,’ mostly his old hockey gear up top and duct tape over his knees. It was bizarre how much one slid while killing zombies. Layered above it all, for more sentimental value than anything else, his old man’s army jacket. Could probably survive...well, the apocalypse. 

“I’m Bucky. And that’s Becca and Sheila.” He stuck out his hand to shake. “And you’ll meet George and Tommy when they get back from scavenging. 

Tony shook his hand. It was easy to say that Buck was well-equipped. Better set up than he was. Tony was just wearing a pair of jeans, a heavy pair of work boots that were a little too big on him, and a thick sweatshirt. “Nice to meet you. I won’t waste your time. I’ll get to work now.” He looked around.

“I might run into them too.” Tony shrugged. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours.” He didn’t really want to intrude on them, they seemed like good people, and..he didn’t want to fuck this up. Tony hadn’t had a chance at safety in..what, six months? It seemed longer than that but it was hard to tell how much time had passed.

It didn’t feel right to just wander in and take unless he could give them something, something tangible. That was why he was already off, exploring the mall with his small bag of tools and ripping out any metal that could help. God, Tony was..tired. He really just wanted to sleep, but it was the middle of the day, he couldn’t nap on the job. He’d just wait for dusk. Normally, he didn’t get much sleep. Weren’t many safe places to sleep outside. It felt like he was doing something wrong, but at least he’d get a little rest when night fell. Maybe that was worth it. 

“Bucky!” Becca hissed in his ear as soon as Tony was gone. “What the hell?” She was still sitting cross-legged on the ground, and looking over at Bucky heatedly. 

“You can’t just invite some stranger in here! What if he’s just gonna steal our supplies during the night. Run off with our water filter?” Bucky poked at the fire a little and tried not to get snippy. There were a lot of reason Bucky was taking this chance. Didn’t Becca see that? Sheila whined a little, and Becca put the bottle back to her lips. 

“There’s a chance we could get a generator outta this Becs. All that needs is fuel and it’ll let us use the radio, or a heater, whatever we can connect. It’ll make it so much more comfo-” 

“Or it’ll burn this place to the ground and leave us without jackshit and zombie bait!” It was strange to Bucky how Becca could yell and stay so quiet. Sheila barely seemed phased by their conversation. Maybe that was a bad thing. 

“This isn’t normal life anymore, Bucky. You can’t just trust your gut and call it a day. You can’t go off the cuff. You can’t be stupid.” 

Tony was back sooner than he expected. Gathering the parts he needed wasn’t so hard, he was surprised it hadn’t been raided more. Nobody seemed to want what he wanted, it seemed. That was when he heard them arguing. About him. The other girl, Becca. In a way, she was right. Tony didn’t know if it would work. But..fuck. He had to make it work. Had to prove that he could be useful somehow. 

He cleared his throat and walked back through to the main area, a good ten feet from both of them. Maybe a little further. It was close to the fountain, which was still full of water, just not running. Maybe that’d make Becca feel better. They could throw his shit in the fountain if it didn’t work. “Should be done with it in a day or two.” Was all he said, and then he got to work. Fuck. Tony was going to prove them wrong. He had to. 

That was the issue with siblings. They knew you too well. Becca knew exactly how to hurt Bucky and she used that knowledge whenever she needed to twist the knife just a little bit more. You could call Bucky a lot of things. Scary. Quiet. Weird. Whatever words you wanted to use, he usually could take it, no skin off his back. 

Except for that. Don’t call him stupid. That one was just...too true. Don’t say it. Please, Becs. I know I am, but...Bucky you can’t seriously think you’re stupid! Look at this paper!... Yeah, but….Yeah but nothing, Buck. You are a good writer and I don’t give a flying fuck if you think it sucks. ‘Cause it doesn’t. 

When Tony came back in, he immediately felt terrible. It really was Becca’s fault, but pinning it all on her would be petty. 

“Really? That soon?” Bucky asked Tony, standing up from where he was sitting and setting his couple pieces of armor down in the big Tupperware he’d come to store them in. 

“That’s awesome, man. I-I uh,” He looked over at Tony, then found it to be like looking at the sun, and looked away, red in the face. Why did he have to have that face? Why did he have to look like a painting?

“Thanks.” 

Tony shrugged a little bit. “I’ll try not to blow the place up. Besides, no reason to keep you waiting. And..it’s not like I have much better to do.” No. He couldn’t look for Jarvis anymore. It was..it was stupid. The man was probably dead. Like everybody else. Why would he be any different? Because he is, his brain said. Stupid brain. 

“You’ve done enough for me anyways. It’s just repayment.” His work was quiet, Tony tried to keep the noise to a minimum. He didn’t want to wake anyone, especially the dead. It sounded bad, but he was afraid to get too attached to anyone at this point. Bucky was probably straight, like everybody else in this wasteland, it seemed. He’d probably get kicked out if he even suggested it. Besides that, what if he did like someone, or if he was even friends with someone, and they were killed? Tony felt like..he’d already lost enough. His old life, his family, everything he’d hoped for before..he didn’t want to lose someone else. So instead, he worked into the night. Even though he had the chance to sleep before..he decided to keep first watch.

\---

The night fell over the mall like a sheet and it was always the worst time of day. The empty expanse of his old town spread out on either side, filled with zombies and corpses and the remains of a life he once lived. He’d stayed up with Tony, poking passively at the embers in the fire pit, and trying to drum up some conversation. Bucky had never been very good at this. 

“My parents were bitten pretty early on.” He said suddenly without taking his eyes off the pit. “It was back when no one really knew what was going on, and y’know so, they went out to get water and supplies back when the stores were still open and, uh-” Bucky swallowed hard and finally flicked his gaze to Tony. 

“I made sure they were comfortable, but after awhile they were more zombie than human and I-” His throat caught on the tears he’d never let fall. 

“I made sure they didn’t-didn’t hurt the kids. That’d been their last wish. And so I did it.” He stared down at his bent knees and then snorted. Bucky laughed softly and ran a hand through his hair, the sound falling flat and breaking the silence. 

“Not really good small talk huh? Just figured I’d tell you why I’m an eighteen-year-old taking care of four kids during the apocalypse.” 

Tony was quiet while he talked, and he had stopped his work. He wasn’t really sure what to say, except- “I’m sorry.” It was the only thing that fit. “My story isn’t quite as interesting. Just..lived in a big house, left, lost track of the only guy who took care of me when I was younger.” That was over-simplified of course. It was much worse than that, but..he didn’t want to go into too much detail. 

 

“I have to say. Zombie dogs are..the worst. Especially dogs that were vicious before.” He kept working for a minute. “I guess after that, I just wandered. Convinced myself I could actually do something about it.” Having a goal to work towards had always been a part of his life. But they were always big, and things that seemed..possible. Just hard. Now, nothing seemed possible or guaranteed. “Tried to find Jarvis.” He looked back at Bucky for a moment.

“I am really sorry about your parents. I’m pretty sure mine were eaten...I didn’t witness it or anything, Jarvis helped me escape. They were already missing and it just- I guess it just seemed like the most logical answer. And uh, if I can help you with the kids, I will.” 

Bucky chuckled lightly, promptly ignoring any more talk about his parents, rather, making a joke. 

“You could be their brother-in-law.” He playfully punched Tony’s arm and smiled a little. He’d take it as a joke, right? Wouldn’t read too into it and think Bucky was a creep even though he just thought he was cute and wanted to let the guy know? He stood up and looked down at Tony, offering his hand. 

“C’mon, we should hit the hay, at least for a couple hours. Becca and Tommy are gonna take the next shift.” Bucky had set up a little bed for Tony across from where the rest of them slept. It was a rudimentary bed, but better than the ground. The pillow was one of Bucky’s old t-shirts filled with a mix of fabric and newspaper and the blanket had most certainly seen better days- had been Georgie’s woobie, until he gave it up, saying he wanted to help out. Broke Bucky’s, damn heart. Kid was fucking four. 

“Your bed’s over there, and I’ll be over here, with Sheila and Georgie.” Bucky knelt down by Becca and gently shook her. 

“Becs, time to get up, your turn.” He reached over his sister to his brother. “You too Tom, okay? It’s two.” 

Tony’s face turned a little pink. Was he blushing? There were fucking zombies outside and he was acting like a middle schooler. “Alright.” He said, quietly. For once, Tony didn’t want to argue. He just wanted to sleep for the next eternity. Until all the zombies were gone and then they could rebuild and maybe dream again.

“Thanks for giving me a bed.” He would’ve been okay on the floor. Tony had slept in strange places, in stranger positions. Once, he had hidden out on the top of a shipping crate. The relative safety of the mall was almost like being home again. Almost. He didn’t waste any more sleeping time though and curled up. A pillow. It wasn’t down, but damn did it feel good to have a pillow. And a few minutes later, he was out like a light. 

Bucky smiled when Tony blushed and he crawled onto the mattress and took Sheila from Becca. Poor thing, it was something Bucky wrestled with often, that she would never know a world without the undead. Without the virus. She wouldn’t know how her oldest brother played hockey, only that he strapped scuffed up pads to his chest and shoulders to go out and trade with another settlement for fresh milk. She would never hear Becca complain about school work or see her mural painted on the living room ceiling. 

Would never know that Georgie and Tommy were just kids too. Never know that when she was first born, both said she had cooties. Bucky sighed and laid down, gently holding his hands, his big hands over Sheila’s little-footed onesie. God, he must look like a monster to her, huh? Must look like the scariest motherfucker. Probably to everyone else too, they just had the sense not to say so. Bucky had changed. He’d changed when he’d seen his parents look at their children like food and he’d changed when he had to slice some walking dead fuck in half with his hockey stick that had been the same one that brought him to nationals. 

But he’d changed because he had to. So his sisters and brothers didn’t have to. Sheila gurgled a little and let out a tiny cry. He rubbed her back gently and sang under his breath. An old song his mom used to sing to him. 

"There is a young cowboy he lives on the range  
His horse and his cattle are his only companions  
He works in the saddle and he sleeps in the canyons  
Waiting for Summer, his pastures to change  
And as the moon rises he sits by his fire  
Thinking about women and glasses of beer  
And closing his eyes as the doggies retire  
He sings out a song which is soft but it's clear  
As if maybe someone could hear  
Goodnight you moonlight ladies  
Rock-a-bye sweet baby James."


	2. Chapter 2

Tony was hungry. But..the little group probably didn’t have any food to spare. Tony dug around in his bag and found a slice of bread. It was stale, but not moldy, so it’d be just fine to have for breakfast. Maybe it wouldn’t keep him full for long, but it was enough. 

After he ate his slice of bread, Tony decided to get back to work. This was important to them and - so it was to him too. It was going okay, though there was still something he needed. “Bucky, can you get me up to the roof? I need the solar panel.” done

Bucky supposed Becca had been right about one thing. And he also supposed that it probably wasn’t a great idea to keep said thing from their guest. But...to appease himself and his sister and to not either freak Tony out or lead him to tell the masses, Bucky had decided the best thing to do was to just keep their gang to himself. 

By gang, he meant the Barnes Raiders (they’d been given that name, hadn’t chosen it themselves, none of the kids had that big an ego yet) and by the raiders, he meant himself and his siblings. The most feared gang in the city. They were known for their twilight plunders that left campsites cleared and the land zombie-free for one mile out. People, so Bucky had overheard while trading at the market, considered them both a savior and a curse. They’d get all the undead and that kept them safe for a week or so, but then the gang also stole their food and batteries and blankets. 

Never all of them. Or none if the group was just as desperate as they were. Five people went through food and water quick, and they’d made the mistake of using their batteries up in the first month or so. Now, if they wanted to so much as hear an emergency PSA, the radio turned on with a hope and a prayer. Which was why Bucky had let Tony stay, even if he was a threat to blowing their cover. 

And Bucky...he was drawn to the man. He knew that was a stupid reason to keep him around, but the feeling was there and just about the only thing that warmed him up on the inside nowadays. 

He crawled out of the bed silently and nodded to Tony, raising one finger up to him. Gimme a second. Bucky first grabbed the lunchbox they held their valuables in and withdrew a lighter, flicking it once over a crumpled page of newspaper. It caught, and soon enough the fire pit was smoking again, and heating up the water suspended above it in a kettle. Now, Becca could make breakfast if Bucky wasn’t down in time. They all got to eat today because today was the morning before a raid, and they needed their strength to stay alert. Bucky waved Tony over to a corner of the shelter and gently pulled down a ceiling tile, revealing a hole leading up to the top, covered only by a piece of cardboard. The only protection that had was visual. It made Bucky feel a little safer knowing there were two layers one would have to dislodge to get down here.

“You just have to pull yourself up there, and then they’ll be on your right.” He smiled a little and shook his head. 

“N’ don’t worry. I won’t let you fall.” 

Tony looked a little hesitant. That looked..sketchy. But, what choice did he have? The way Bucky was looking at him helped a little. “Alright.” He was short though, and not able to jump high enough to reach and pull himself up.”Fuck,” He muttered, blushing. Tony looked at him.

“Can you uh- help me up? I’m..too short.” He hated being short, but at least it meant he could fit in boxes. That helped sometimes. That was really the only advantage too. Most of it was awful, not being able to get the last box of pop tarts on the shelf or being able to get up to the roof. 

“It shouldn’t take me long to get it down but I might need a little help. Solar panels are usually pretty heavy.” And they weren’t typically meant to be ripped off the roof. He was just hoping this mall had tried to be eco-friendly before the apocalypse- Tony thought he’d seen a few signs talking about it. 

Bucky nodded and wrapped his arms around Tony’s middle, not realizing the intimacy of the situation until he right smack in it. He had his hands on the man’s hips and they were pressed together as if in an embrace. 

Ignoring the heat in his chest, Bucky hoisted Tony up and held him until he caught the edge of the roof and was able to pull himself up the rest of the way. Bucky watched him go, and sighed a little, following him. He knew he’d never have a chance in hell with him. Especially not now. He was too much of a burden. Having four siblings as part of the deal turned most potential suitors off, considering how many more mouths that had to be fed. And bodies to clothe. And people to keep healthy and unbitten. 

“Is that it?” Bucky asked when his head popped up onto the roof, spotting a big panel glinting in the light. There were a few other people cooking and scrapping as the sun rose, but the mall was a community now. They weren’t dangerous.   
Tony felt hot and nervous. Bucky had been so close. As though the world wasn’t over and they could just cuddle forever. “Uh, yeah. Let me detach it.” Most people didn’t even think about solar energy now. Climate change was the least of their worries. But, Tony had another reason- gasoline was hard to come by, and so was diesel. Really, any type of fuel. But nobody could steal the sun. At least, he hoped not. 

“It’ll just take me a minute.” He knelt down and used his socket wrench to get it off. It only took about ten minutes. One benefit of being small was that he was able to crawl right underneath it. Bucky couldn’t do that. Probably. 

“Now I’m ready.” He went over to one side. “We have to be careful not to shatter it. Can you get the other end?” Tony had to resist a dreamy sigh as he watched Bucky. The man was so out of his league. Strong, handsome, a leader..and a little scary too. Tony liked that. But he was just a nerd and didn’t really have any useful apocalypse skill. What would someone like Bucky want with someone like him? Maybe a quick fuck, but..love didn’t exist out here anymore.

Bucky took the other side of the panel in his hands and held it like he did Sheila. Careful and softly but with balance. He wouldn’t drop it, Bucky knew that. The real issue would be getting it off the roof. He bit his lip and looked behind himself. 

“Okay, so we’ll have to get it to the hatch, that’s over there,” He pointed to another hidden hole in the roof, this one a bit bigger, but further from the shelter. They’d have to walk through the ruins of the mall to get back, and risk being solicited by some of the merchants- not that they really had much of a business- and though Bucky could probably get them out of it, it just meant more time for the panel to break. 

“I’ll walk down backwards, and carry most of the weight. All you gotta do is guide it and keep it steady, okay?” 

Tony nodded a little bit. “I’ll keep it steady.” He walked slowly. This was the most vital part, and he was terrified they’d drop the panel. It was hard normally, without rubble everywhere. They’d have to be careful. Tony walked forward slowly, keeping Bucky’s pace. The panel was still heavy on his side, but Bucky had the brunt of it. 

As they moved slowly, Tony felt the need to say something. “Thank you for helping me, and for taking me in. I’m trying not to be any trouble.” He chewed on his lip.”Most people and places around here aren’t so friendly.” Most of them wanted to kill him. Or take everything he had. It wasn’t easy for him to trust again. Not yet.

“Sorry if I seem kind of..stand-offish. It’s just been a while since I’ve met anyone as nice as you.” 

Bucky was too busy trying to keep the solar panel from shattering to bits to really respond to Tony.   
“What? Yeah, you’re welcome. Not a big deal.” He grunted and readjusted his hands under the metal. Bucky had found it odd though, that Tony had called him friendly and nice. A year ago? Sure? Six months ago? Probably. Now? Not a damn chance. He still felt like he was those things, there was just no excuse to show it. And especially now that people had started rumors about him. Well not him, they didn’t know it was that nice boy who took in all his brothers and sisters when their parents turned and they didn’t know that after everyone snuffed their lights out he took those darlings out and they found themselves some real food and some fresh water that hadn’t been strained through cheesecloth. 

They didn’t know that the man they traded lighter fluid for rice with was the same one that had wiped out twenty zombies one night with just his hockey stick and had looted the vault as compensation. It was only fair, though. If he and Becca and Tommy were gonna risk their lives clearing out more zombies than some of these people got in a month, they better be getting something fucking extra. 

“Alright, you got it, Tony.” He said through grit teeth. “Just a couple more feet and then I’ll lower myself down.” 

Tony closed his eyes halfway and nodded. It was heavy but they could do it. Bucky didn’t want to talk and that made sense, but Tony only talked a lot when he was under pressure. They were just a little different. He’d been through a lot, told to shut up one too many times since it all went to shit. Most people weren’t interested in what he had to say.

“We’re almost there.” They were close to the hole. “I’ll try and hold it from this side. Don’t worry if one panel breaks, we just have to keep the rest intact.” As many as possible, really. “We just need something to power the generator.” He wasn’t going to set the damn mall on fire. He was going to help.

“I’ll try and support it.” Support Bucky. That was the right thing to do.

Bucky and Tony somehow made it down through the roof and to the linoleum floor covered with about an inch of dust and rubble. He held it steady as Tony maneuvered through the hole and got back onto solid ground. The walk back was thankfully uneventful and the panel fit against the wall in their shelter. 

“You want some breakfast?” Bucky asked after they’d put the sheet of metal down. “Becca made some oatmeal.” He shrugged and smiled a little. It almost felt like he was his awkward fifth-grade self, having a friend over and not sure how to talk to them. Maybe that was why he went with the scary approach now- he didn’t know how to talk to people. Still. 

Becca glared at him for his offer and held the baby out for him to hold. By the way Tom was grimacing he’d assumed he had diaper duty this morning. The kid could look at zombie guts no problem, but he still hadn’t gotten over a dirty diaper. 

“You really think this will work?” She asked Tony, words sharp as daggers. “Or are you a Doc Brown type and we’re gonna have to wait until you hit your head for anything to work?” 

Tony shook his head. “I already ate.” And just like that, he was closed up again. “And I’d say there’s about a 90% of it working. I went to fucking MIT, I can make a basic generator. Could make a nice generator, if I had more materials. Power tools.” If she wasn’t rude, he’d make a nice enough one to power the whole fucking mall. 

“It’ll be done soon. Maybe tomorrow or the next day.” He frowned a little. “Tomorrow.” He’d work all night if he had to. Even though this place was safe, it..it probably wasn’t home. He’d have to keep searching for that. Things seemed okay at night, but everyone except Bucky seemed to hate him. So instead, he turned and got back to work. It wouldn’t take him long to attach the panel, but it’d take a bit longer to optimize its position with the sunroof. He’d have to hurry before sunset.

Bucky frowned as he saw Tony close in on himself again, physically hunching to hide- be smaller. Out of the way. He took the bowl of oatmeal from Becca and gave her a look. 

“Would it kill you to be nice for one damn second?” She stared at the embers in the fire pit, scraping together more bowls of oatmeal. He counted one extra. For Tony. 

“Would it kill you to not be an idiot for once?” She nearly threw Tommy’s breakfast on him, he only just caught it before it spilled. He was closing up too. He hated it when they fought, which was becoming increasingly often. Over raids, food, the other kids, sleeping- anything they could disagree on ignited their tempers. 

“Well, wasn’t I the one who fixed us up in the mall? Wasn’t I the one who taught you how to pick a lock and made sure you didn’t drink grey water?” Bucky narrowed his eyes and shook his head, walking over to the bed and laying Sheila down and eating a bite of food before feeding her as well. Georgie, nearly oblivious to the tension, got up from where he was on Tony’s bed, where his woobie was. He walked over to Tony and put a hand on his shoulder. 

“The blankie on your bed used’a be mine, and it gets cold here sometimes, and the blankie is warmer on the Pooh Bear side. It’s all fuzzy.” He smiled, dark brown curls framing his face and making him look like he belonged on the Sistine Chapel. 

“Becca n’ Bucky saids it’s the fuzz that makes you all toasty like a marshmallow.” 

Tony turned to face the kid and smiled a little, listening. “Well..y’know, you could have the blanket back if you wanted.” He shrugged. “I get hot in the nighttime and if Pooh Bear makes you happy...I bet he’d rather stay with you too.” Tony didn’t really need a blanket. He’d slept enough nights without one. Georgie was just a little kid who deserved to be one for a while longer. 

Tony got up and picked up the blanket. “In fact, here.” He got into his bag. “I found something a while back that I thought you might like.” It was a doll. Just a barbie, nothing really special, but..he’d picked it up to give to a kid. “I know it isn’t much, but I wasn’t sure whether you had any toys.” It was probably pretty low on the priority list, but..kids needed toys. It was how they learned to do shit. “Here. Can you share it with your younger sister though, when she gets a little older? I’m sure she’ll like it too.” The next time he was out, he’d try to find more. That way, they could have more to do besides just sitting around. 

“I’m gonna get back to work, alright? But if you need me, you can come talk to me again.” 

Bucky watched their interaction and his attraction to the man only grew. God damn it. He’d barely been here two days and he was giving Georgie more attention than sometimes they did. It was bad. They didn’t mean to, of course not, but when there were three other kids, Bucky was just trying to make sure they were alive. He bounced Sheila on his leg a little as he stared at Tony’s back, lost in wondering how his lips tasted and how he’d look on the ice if he’d never skated and if he liked kissing under the stars in the back of a pickup truck too and-

“Bucky.” He looked up to see Tommy at his right, smiling widely, like he’d just heard the world’s funniest joke. 

“I think Shelia’s had enough bouncing.” He put a hand on his shoulder and mimicked their father. 

“I think it’s time you got your head out of the gutter, son.” Bucky chuckled a little, but when he met his brother’s eyes, he was almost relieved to see the same shine of devastation that was in his own. 

Tony could feel their eyes on him. Thank God his back was turned, they couldn’t see the blush or how nervous he felt. His hands were shaking. He didn’t say anything or looked back, just waiting for it to break. Finally, it did. Then he felt safe enough to get back to work. Sometimes, out there..he felt like a piece of meat. People treated him that way too. Any piece of ass seemed to do, but he was always a favorite. 

He just wanted to finish the generator. It seemed like the most important thing in the world to him at the moment. Bucky really wasn’t a bad person. No worse than anyone else on the outside, and he was at least a little bit more subtle about what he wanted. Less forceful, that was for damn sure. But, not everybody liked him. Most of them didn’t, and..he just wanted to help and move on. They’d helped him enough, and..where was he welcome, anyway? It was alright, he didn’t really mind wandering. It gave him a chance to keep looking for Jarvis. 

It’d be done soon. He just had to keep at it and then Becca wouldn’t be so angry at him and he could prove that he was worth feeding. At least a little bit. Maybe they’d let him stay and maybe he’d consider it. Tony missed building things. He was tired of running. But..was camp the best place for him?


	3. Chapter 3

Tommy was pissed, but Bucky had told him either stand guard or he wouldn’t be going on any raids for awhile. He’d relented, and now was actually reading his old math textbook by the firelight. What the apocalypse did to you, huh? He was suiting up, as was Becca, sliding her knives into their thigh holsters and zipping up her leather biker jacket. It was ridiculously hard to bite through leather, so the more you had the better. 

The two of them, of course, were doing this all away from Tony. Right out in the lean-to. Told him that they were just going to trade with some people across the mall. They weren’t about to tell him who they were. Not yet. Bucky grabbed his sharpened hockey stick and put it on his back. Tom had made a little strap out of old t-shirts for it. Worked pretty well. 

“Alright, so don’t try anything new tonight, alright Becs?” He said as they walked out into the dark, the only light being the flickering street lamps and the stars. 

“We go in, clear ‘em out, and go home.”

Tony was taking a little break by the fire. He’d heard some whispers, some weird things, but..he hadn’t been able to piece anything together. Not into anything rational. Instead he was eating leftover oatmeal, and trying to make conversation with Tommy.

“Do you do anything around here besides read? I’m just curious if you do anything else for fun, I mean.” Tony was kind of trying to scope out the amenities, so to speak. He wasn’t expecting a garden tub, but he wanted to see what everyday life was like. Assuming he’d be offered a place. 

“I don’t really know what people do for fun anymore.” He had never stayed at a settlement for longer than a night before, and he’d always regretted it. “It’s uh- been a while.” Usually, he was working or running. But a good round of cards sounded nice. Did people still play dominoes? Or gin rummy? 

“Hey shit-for-brains, I’m over here!” Becca was right behind him, taunting a zombie to come closer. Bucky was keeping the ones on his end at bay, slicing the ones in range and shooting rocks at the ones in sniping distance. Was a little funny how similar it was to hockey. 

“Okay, Buck, I got three of ‘em, comin’ in fast. Get ready, in one, two-” Becca was a gymnast, back before the world went to hell. Well, a figure skater technically, but she preferred the land workouts better, so Bucky listened and said, gymnast. Either way, she was agile and good in the air. Which was why when she used him as a platform, it almost always worked. Like right now. 

“That’s how it’s done!” She hissed, pulling her knives from the two bodies and wiping them off in the grass. Bucky slashed the last couple walkers and then lowered his stick, panting a little. Now, for the fun part. 

They’d gone out about a mile, to a little encampment stuck between a McDonald’s and the chain link fence of a parking lot. Easy pickings. The people here were still naive and had left their supplies right out in the open, and Becca and Bucky cleaned them out- the ones who were still clean after ‘surviving’ the elements, and the ones who were still using their radio for music and their phones for games. They took some clean shirts and some batteries, and a half-eaten pack of Peanut M&M’s. Wasn’t as much as they’d hoped, but there was one great find- two rolls of bandages. Not only could they use those, they could trade squares for almost anything. Water, food, socks, you name it and someone would probably trade it for a length of real bandage. 

Bucky found Becca at the edge of the camp, smiling suspiciously. She held up a square of cardboard that she’d drawn on. Their symbol of sorts, a double wing, and a heart. 

“Get it?” She asked, sounding more like a kid than she had in ages. “It says love, us! Y’know so then they’ll find it and-” Bucky rolled his eyes and put a hand on her shoulder, guiding her back to the road. They needed to get back home, unload their packs and try and get some sleep. 

“A calling card, Becs. A calling card. You sure that isn’t a little too on the nose, though?” Sure, they’d left the wings at other sites before, but really, a heart? Was she Harley Quinn? Bucky was about to say something sarcastic, but he stopped himself when he saw her expression. Brighter than the stars. 

“It’s great.” He said sincerely, throwing his arm around her shoulders and squeezing them lightly, dropping a kiss on her head. 

“You did good tonight, Becs. Real good.” 

Tony had been waiting a while. They sure were taking their time trading. Especially at..two am. After beating the pants off of Tom at dice, he went back to work. He was tired, but the generator wasn’t too far from being done. If he could somehow get ahold of tools, it was a good starting point. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to power the whole mall, but definitely what they’d need for a good while. Winter would be more complicated. But maybe the undead would just freeze over and stop for awhile.

He didn’t look up when they got back, not until they went closer to the fire with their haul. He brought his own crossbody bag, thinking that maybe he could trade something if they had something he wanted. That was when he saw they had near brand new shirts, and one of them, which was red, looked just about his size. It wouldn’t be good for wearing outside, but..here? It’d be safe enough. And red was his color. “Can I trade something for that?” He asked, digging around. He wasn’t sure what yet. But there had to be something they’d want.

Bucky shook his head and just tossed Tony the shirt. “Just take it, Tones. We don’t need six shirts, and you deserve something nice too.” He shrugged a little and rubbed his eyes, yawning. Fuck, was he tired. Sleepily, he put his bag away and set it in their bigger ‘lockbox (just a big tote with a lock on it), along with Becca’s things. They’d go through it come morning. 

“Well,” He sighed, standing up. “I’m gonna go to sleep. You probably should too. It’s late and Pooh Bear’s lonely.” 

Tony chuckled. “That’s okay. He’s with Georgie now. But..I’ll get some rest.” Bucky seemed like he really did want him to get some sleep. He appreciated the shirt, at least. For a second, his expression softened. “Thanks. For this and feeding me, and letting me stay here.” He chewed on his lip. “I can’t remember the last time I felt this safe.” Since before or after the zombies.

“Means a lot to me.” He walked back over to his small bed area and curled up. Tony didn’t like to cause trouble, take up too much room. But..he was starting to get comfortable in the small encampment. Even though the generator was nearly done, he didn’t want to leave. Even though Becca didn’t like him, Tom seemed to. And Georgie did, and so did Bucky. That..that was pretty good odds.

Bucky tried to brush him off, his kind words, but his expression betrayed him. It held too much care. 

“It’s nothing, man. Just ‘cause we’re losing humans doesn’t mean we gotta lose our humanity, right?” He half smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed, unlacing his boots and then carefully picking his way to the pillow, making sure not to rouse any of the kids. This was the only time they ever seemed to be at peace.

“I’ll see ya in the morning, okay?”


End file.
